Fall Movie Bash

Madison, Mommy and Daddy went to the KidPak Fall Movie Bash tonight, and as you can see tonight, we saw "Free Birds," which is a surprisingly good movie.  Or, to quote their own campaign, the "greatest turkey movie of all time."  We had plenty of other fun tonight, including the world famous Thanksgiving Day cooking skit, that Madison got to see for the first time.  Lance and Daddy were up on stage doing a few skits, including this one:

Fall Movie Bash

Thanksgiving Stuffing

WISENHEIMER:  “It’s Thanksgiving season!”

LANCE:  “That’s right!  In fact, let’s do a little game.  After everything I say, everyone in the audience say this:  ‘and so did the Professor!’  Got it?”

WISENHEIMER:  "I don't know about this, Lance."

LANCE:  (ignoring him) "Let’s try it out.  Ahem!  I came to church today.”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

LANCE:  “I went over to Mom’s house for Thanksgiving.”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

LANCE:  “I listened to Mom say grace at the table.”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

LANCE:  “I had a great Thanksgiving dinner!”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

LANCE:  “I ate a huge slice of turkey!”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

LANCE:  “And Mom tooted!”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

WISENHEIMER:  “I did not!”

LANCE:  “I watched a great football game on the television.”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

LANCE:  “And somebody picked a big honkin’ booger from their nose!”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

WISENHEIMER:  “Lance….!”

LANCE:  “And then they ate it!”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

WISENHEIMER:  “That’s enough of that, Lance!”

LANCE:  “I saw a huge parade on television with marching bands and giant balloons!”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

LANCE:  “I saw a huge balloon shaped like Spongebob Squarepants.”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

LANCE:  “Uh-oh!  I watched the balloon handlers have trouble with the balloon!”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

LANCE:  “It floated off into the sky!”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

LANCE:  “It popped!”

AUDIENCE:  “And so did the Professor!”

WISENHEIMER:  “That is so not true, Lance!  Look, let’s get on to what we were supposed to be doing.  The cooking show – where we can learn how to make the best Thanksgiving dinner possible!”

CUE TRACK 1:  INFOMERCIAL

LANCE: “ You got it!”

LANCE escorts WISENHEIMER to table on stage.

WISENHEIMER:  “Wow, Lance.  This is so great of you to help us with our cooking.  So this is a recipe for Thanksgiving, what’s it called?

LANCE:  “Thanksgiving Surprise.”

WISENHEIMER: “Why is it called that?”

LANCE: “It wouldn’t be a surprise if I told you!”

WISENHEIMER:  “Nice.  Well why don’t we get started?”

LANCE:  “Okay.”

LANCE grabs a box and starts to open it, to pour into mixing bowl.

WISENHEIMER:  “What are you putting in there first?”

LANCE:  “A box of quackers.”

WISENHEIMER:  “Quackers?  Don’t you mean crackers?”

LANCE:  “No.  Quackers.”

When LANCE pours box into bowl,

CUE SOUND EFFECT:  DUCKS QUACKING

WISENHEIMER looks stunned.

LANCE picks up container of orange juice and stares at it.

WISENHEIMER:  “What are you doing now?”

LANCE continues to stare.

WISENHEIMER:  “I said, excuse me!  What are you doing?”

LANCE:  “Shhhh.  What’s it say to do?”

LANCE hands box to WISENHEIMER.

WISENHEIMER:  “Concentrate.”

LANCE:  “Shhhh!  I’m concentrating.  Don’t break my concentration.”

WISENHEIMER:  “Very funny.  Hey, what’s that over there!”

WISENHEIMER picks up a box and starts to open it.

LANCE:  “Don’t do that!  It’s impolite to look at it while it is dressing.”

WISENHEIMER:  “Oh.  Sorry.”

WISENHEIMER realizes how silly that was.

WISENHEIMER:  “D’oh!  Lance, you’re not going to sit here and do the same old bad jokes.”

LANCE:  “Nope.  I’ve got nothing but new bad jokes.  Hey, knock-knock.”

WISENHEIMER sighs.

WISENHEIMER:  “Who’s there?”

LANCE picks up head of lettuce.

LANCE:  “Lettuce.”

WISENHEIMER:  “Lettuce who?”

LANCE:  “Lettuce stop arguing, okay?”

WISENHEIMER rolls eyes.

WISENHEIMER:  “That’s very funny.  So what are you doing now?”

WISENHEIMER samples lettuce.

LANCE:  “In many different cultures, people eat all sorts of different things.”

WISENHEIMER nods.

LANCE:  “Do you think it is okay to eat a caterpillar?”

WISENHEIMER:  “A caterpillar?  What’s the matter with you?  That’s nasty to bring up gross stuff like that.  Why do you say that?”

LANCE:  “Because I saw one on your lettuce but it’s gone now.”

WISENHEIMER loudly spits out lettuce.

LANCE:  “Are you okay?”

WISENHEIMER glares at LANCE.

LANCE:  “I just heard something about the butter too.”

WISENHEIMER:  “You did?  What?  What?”

LANCE:  “No.  I better not tell you.  You’ll spread it.”

WISENHEIMER stares at LANCE blankly.

LANCE:  “Spread it?  Get it?  SPREAD IT?”

LANCE laughs.

WISENHEIMER:  “You are a sick, twisted little man.”

LANCE:  “Here.”

LANCE grabs butter and throws it to other side of stage.

WISENHEIMER:  “What’d you do that for?”

LANCE:  “I wanted to see a butterfly.”

WISENHEIMER:  “I thought you were going to have a cooking demonstration or something.”

LANCE:  “No, I’m giving you a Thanksgiving surprise.”

WISENHEIMER: “What’s the surprise?”

LANCE: “I’d tell you, but it wouldn’t be a surprise, would it?”

WISENHEIMER: “Okay, that’s enough of that.  So… you got all this food.  But where’s the turkey at?”

LANCE:  “Shhhhhh!”

WISENHEIMER is stunned.

LANCE:  “I haven’t forgotten that part.  Here he comes now!”

WISENHEIMER: “There are no wild turkeys around here.”

TURKEY enters STAGE RIGHT

LANCE: “What were you saying?”

TURKEY panics and screams real loud.  LANCE chases TURKEY through audience, up and down aisles, and eventually out back door.

WISENHEIMER:  “Uh… KidPak?  We’ll be right back.  I’d better go make sure nobody gets hurt.”

WISENHEIMER runs off back stage.

**________**

It was a full day, with lots of filming, including some early Thanksgiving videos for KPTV.  Here's a screen shot of a family saying grace over a meal cooked by a mamma there that everyone knows can't cook too well.

Dear Lord, please don't let anyone go to the hospital again after they eat this.  It was a pretty goofy skit, but lots of fun.  It also took a while, but after editing it all together, things turned out rather well.  We also shot a few other videos, and wrote the skits for this weekend, so it was an insanely full day.

But it was a fun one.  Madison really enjoyed the evening, which had a Thanksgiving feel to it.  We even had that big inflatable turkey out in the lobby - one Daddy and Mommy purchased recently from Wal-Mart.  Eventually we'll get a picture of Madison with the turkey.  Maybe closer to Thanksgiving.  Until then, we'll celebrate the season, and say thank you time and again for a great day!